Thought it would be done by now...part 2

[AJM]

Unbelievable? Perhaps. Sad? Certainly.

As for the people that look at you, I was reminded of a study done for a psychology research project. Basically, the situation was for interviews. Prior to the interviews, the test administrators painted a red dot on the left cheek of the interviewers. They wanted to test to see if the interviewees would stare or otherwise treat the interviewer differently.

100% of the interviewers reported the interviewee stared at the red dot and that it made them a little indignant and uncomfortable.

Later, it was revealed that only 50% of the interviewers actually had a red dot painted on their cheek. The rest had been painted with plain water that left no mark.

Is it possible you have an invisible red dot painted on your cheek?

I struggled with this issue for a brief period of time but realize that others might struggle with it longer. I am not the type of person to really care what others think. I don't get embarassed easily either.

For me, I had to figure out what my part was in the collapse of the relationship. In my case, very little which left me wondering what I had done with my time.. I resolved that with the understanding that I did my best each and every day with the tools and the information I had available to me at that time. I never coasted or otherwise did less than my best. Still don't.

That said, I realized that I had nothing to be ashamed of, and I also realized some people would wonder things regardless of my thoughts or actions. They do actually wonder. Let 'em. I continue to smile knowing I did my best and did not fail. My ex walked away and is angry. Let her. I have my own life to live.

You'll be surprised as people find out about your situation what they start to tell you about their own life. I think you'll find that you are not that uncommon in what you have experienced from him. Sadly.

Be well and think about it.

AJ