I learned early in my sitch that putting my hand on the hot stove would keep being painful.

What I mean is:

Try not to snoop; nothing good comes from it, and it just increases you pain, anxiety, frustration, depression, the list goes on and on and on.

You cannot control what he does, thinks, feels, wants, plans, this list goes on and on and on as well.

But don't feel helpless. Take care of YOURSELF and D. Don't let your mood, your happiness, your peace of mind, your FUTURE, depend on him. Think of him as an emotional millstone tied to your ankle in the emotional ocean. Don't let that millstone drag you to the bottom; cut the rope.

Once detached, you can think straight and work on what you really want in life.

Me 53 XW 50
M 18 Years +2
S14 D19
Bomb 10-24-10
Served 1-27-11
Mediate 4-21-11
Civil D Final 6-2-11
No church anullment
"A man is not finished when he is defeated, he is finished when he quits."