Well, I'm not surprised he'd say who wants to be alone. I'd never have been alone if XH's actions didn't force that on me. I kicked and screamed against that for far too long.
But the end result was that I am an entirely new person and I kept the good stuff and got rid of the bad and I am a BADA*S chick right now, if I do say so myself...totally self-reliant, whole, and strong, but also really able to let people do their thing and stand back and not be codependent...the whole 9, which is probably exactly like you are, TAMF.
It's the fact that he resists "wanting" to be alone that means he SHOULD be, as you know. It's the only way to really learn how to face your innermost demons and you either face them and become friends or you run away.
I think another facet of this is that until you learn how to be alone and actually find that you can be HAPPY by yourself (as in happy with friends and family but not needing the romantic part to be happy) then you will always hold up the romantic relationship as "the thing" that you "must have" to be whole. It puts an enormous amount of pressure on that relationship, and when the relationship starts to crack, you just go running for another one, because you don't have enough of your own life together to handle being single.
Whoever wrote that stupid line in that movie "You complete me" needs to be beat up ;-) That very notion is a relationship killer in the end. If we've done the work, we complete ourselves. Only THEN can we really give to someone else.
I'm so glad you're so centered and able to see what is best for you right now. I'm sure that having a smooth talker saying "all the right things" is tough to face down!
M45 Bomb 6/09; EA 6/10; Divorced 1/11 Proud single mom of 7 little feline girls and one little feline boy "Fall down 53 times. Get up 54." -- Zen saying
