I hope you dont mind me chiming in, Tad, even though you didnt name me. LOL!

I remember so well going around in circles as you are now. I was in a loop I couldnt get out of.

He seems happy, he must really be done, but he is still engaging with me, so maybe he isnt, he is crazy, but maybe he isnt.

Round and round I went. I just couldnt get out of the loop. Until one day I realized something.

It didnt matter. The whys didnt matter. It didnt change anything. It just kept me stuck. There was no real explanation. It was just what is.

The truth of the matter was that he didnt want to be with me now. He wanted space. He wanted to try to find happiness.

I needed to hear him. Really hear him. Because if I didnt, I was invalidating his feelings. If I didnt then, part of what he was saying was true. If I didnt, then I was destined to stay right there in that place indefinitely.

I chose not to live my life that way.

I realized that if I loved him as much as I kept saying I did, then, I needed to accept what he felt and I needed to let him go with love.

I wished him peace and happiness. I prayed that he find what he was looking for and I let him go.

And I began to live my life. I began to figure ME out.

Honor the years together and your love and let her go. The sooner you do, the sooner she gets to try and figure it all out. But more importantly, the sooner you do, the sooner you become the person you were meant to be.

I will tell you that my xh seemed to be the happiest person in the world. He was living life and doing all sorts of things. If you would have told me he wasnt happy I would have told you. you were crazy.

Turns out he was anything but happy. Not what I wanted for him, but, there you have it.

Live YOUR life, Tad. Live your life.