WAW, not sure how to proceed...Part II

[dearme]

My sense of loss, loneliness, grief, despair... these are things I've learned or am learning to deal with. Uncertainty, on the other hand... that's the demon I really need to learn to sit with.

The anger from my wife repeatedly rears it's ugly head. The way things were between us makes her angry. The fact that I'm changing makes her angry. The fact that I understand and accept her anger makes her angry. The fact that I'm willing to stay here without any commitment or promises from her makes her angry. The fact that I haven't told her she has to leave makes her angry. She told me today that her head believes my changes are real and permanent but that her heart doesn't. It angered her that I was willing to accept that that's where she is right now.

The thing is...she can say she is angry...but she still doesn't really express it. Not in the way I would expect at any rate. She says she still doesn't want to express it...that to do so makes her uncomfortable and anxious, and part of her feels like there isn't any point. My opinion, that I keep to myself, is that that IS the point. She needs to get to a place where expressing anger doesn't make her feel that way...to find a way to express it in a healthy manner.