I am sorry to see you here, but this is a great resource to help you deal with your situation. Like you, my W also started an online relationship with an old high school "friend". Be very careful and aware of that relationship, but do not snoop - don't check her cell phone for TMs, don't check her e-mail, don't try to pry into her Facebook account (if she has one). I say this to you because I did all of those things for the 5 months my W stayed in our house while we were "separated" (separate bedrooms, avoiding each other...very uncomfortable) and it accelerated her exit out of the house.
The painful fact is, there is nothing you can do to change her mind, her attitude or her actions. All you can do is control your own attitude and actions. Do not bring up your marriage or reconciliation; she is not interested in thinking about that. She is the center of her own world right now, and your place in her life has been demoted. There is no logical reason or explanation for this; don't try to find one or pry one out of her.
Be as physically active as you can be. Walk, run, bike, join a gym...anything to keep your body moving. Distract and occupy your mind with anything other than the situation.
Now...I'm going to give you my opinion regarding the high school "friend", and some people on here may disagree with this. If you get a chance to read about my situation, you will see why this is such a sensitive area for me. You need to determine what you will and will not tolerate regarding your W's relationship and involvement with the friend. An MLC is one thing; an EA is another. As long as she is getting her emotional needs met by someone else, anything you do to improve yourself or your situation will be ignored or not noticed. I can't tell you where the line should be drawn, but I can tell that I let my W's EA get completely out of hand right in front of me and it caused her to lose what little respect was left.
Detach as much as you possibly can, then detach some more. Don't lose your self-esteem or self-respect. Those are yours, and nobody should be able to take those away from you.
Post often; soon your "moderated" status will be lifted and they will appear as soon as you post.
H 56 W 48 D27,S21 SS25 SS22 Severely autistic M(#2 for both) 9 1/2 yrs. "I've never loved you" 3/7/2011 Separated 8/7/2011 BITS
