Yep, H was mean when he drank. He also got into a lot of legal jams. It was his drinking -- more than the OW -- that was the real issue for me.
Until recently, our phone calls centered on the kids or business. He never asked about me or my welfare. But the past several phone calls have been ALL about me. That's what made me know that the "old H" was coming back.
Until they show a real interest in YOU, then they're not ready to come home IMO.
