You were one of the key ones to help me through a very rough time of my life. Thank you!
My initial bomb was 4 years ago and I have been divorced for two years. My XH has remarried - one year after the divorce. And he married a former friend of mine. He sees his teenage children maybe once a week for about an hour. His wife, other than hello, does not speak to them.
I don't see him and prefer it that way. Our communication now is very, very limited. I only text for medical matters or anything along those lines. Last spring, a very dear family friend passed away. I went to the funeral home and was rewarded with scathing text messages from XH ordering me to stay away. It was at that time that my communications with XH changed. I have been trying for four years to be civil and keep the peace. This situation was the proverbial straw for me. While I am not nasty in any way, nor do I speak of him in a derogatory manner, I will no longer put myself in a position to be treated like that again.
I still have some work to do on myself. Recently, I have found myself somewhat bitter at the change of circumstances in my life. I do know that I am in a better position because I have a great relationship with my girls. But I do worry about finances and it is difficult to see him living large. I have been dating, but that is challenging because I have the girls all of the time. I am not complaining about this - I am very blessed to have them. But it is difficult to develop a relationship when you can't put any time into it. But I would say that my biggest hurdle is the continued hurt he causes the girls. It is constant that they talk to me about what he has said, or done that is hurtful to them. It is hard to move on because I think that in order to do that, you must deal with the anger. It is hard to deal with anger when it is constant and it is because of your children. I sometimes ask myself how long will it be until he no longer invades my thoughts..... I just feel that at this point in this journey - I should be completely done with him but he is still there. I am counting the years until I can move - I have to wait for my youngest to finish school. That will be the biggest and best step for me.
But all in all, I am far better than I was a year ago, and a completely different person from two and three years ago. DB did wonders in saving me....which is really what it is about.
