I have been too focused on hoping the negatives of this situation will get her to reconsider her decision as they start to become apparent to her.
My not doing everything I possibly can to improve myself make it more unlikely she will come back. It is so easy to say but difficult to do....I NEED to control the controllables.
read THIS^^^^ again and again...and let it sink in.
Where the head goes, the heart will follow...(eventually)
The harder you make it for her to come back...the harder it will be!
Figure this no brainer out. Stop trying to guilt/punish her. If you want her back then you have to
KEEP THE ROAD HOME PAVED AND SMOOTH...she's a mom. She will always have guilt about her kids. She doesn't need You to remind her of it more plus it hurts your cause.
it's an example of you putting your anger and desire to "show her a thing or two" taking priority over your desire to reconcile....for God's sake see this and change it before it's too late.
And day to day contact does NOT always make it easier to see changes. Just the opposite.
Plus it's much much harder TO MAKE the changes when the WAS is always around.
Use this gift of time to work on yourself and make the changes so obvoius that when you do have contact
which you will have
it'll be obvious and demonstrable. Same with phone conversations AND with getting her to wonder about what you are doing with your free time
all things that won't happen with you staring at her all the time...and getting in her face b/c your record so far of being able to back off....is lousy.
Have you truly read the Div Remedy book to the end? Please do so b/c some of this is amptly covered in it. It'll reinforce your plan of action, which is to work on yourself ONLY.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
