I fear my W is slipping into a deep depression. I explained our situation to a friend of mine who feels the antidepressants she’s taking may be playing a major role in my W’s behavior. She is on a low dose prescription. It may be and explanation for her precipitous downward slide. Doesn’t seem the explanation can be that simple though.
I am concerned for her. I reached out to her BF just to verify that my W wasn’t holding everything inside. She is so nice and worried about burdening people that I could see her not confiding in anyone about our situation. She said they are talking which makes me feel better.
I am considering offering to swap nights out of the house with her. We could leave the kids in the home and we could set a schedule to stay away. I want to help her but don’t want to hurt the kids. She is taking a strange approach….feels like if the kids are going to have a 2 year “recovery period”, why not start it now and “get it over with?”. I love her to pieces but feel she is so naïve about what a D does to kids.
The reality of our impending financial situation is also starting to hit home with her. When this thing first started, she was looking to buy a new home (in the 3000 sf range) in her hometown which is a higher end community about 10 miles away from us. She said she wanted to have the kids go to school there too...I immediately told her that wasn't goin to happen. She now is considering moving into a 1200 sf 100 yr old investment house in our current town. All of our lives are going to change dramatically and she is starting to see the reality of that I think. I think this adds to her guilt.
She mentioned last night how I used to be so certain of my opinions that I wouldn’t consider other people’s insight or thoughts. She is doing the exact same thing regarding this D. It is so spooky that we each seemed to have turned into the other person. She has taken my old persona above and beyond though IMHO.
