Maryr, So sorry you are here. I wish you weren't. I wish I wasn't. I saw 67 people viewing our forum today. Just so sad.
If the Bomb was dropped in June, you still a newby. Not eating, sleeping, feel like you are dying. All normal stuff honey. It doesn't go away overnight. He!!, I still don't sleep well after almost 6 months. But it does fade.
That's why GALing is SOOO important. You may not want to do, but force yourself to do it. At first I used to GAL to just stop that "dying" feeling. It was hard at first caz I wished w was with me.. but it got easier.
Treat yourself too. First thing I did was get a new haircut. Then as I continued to lose weight (only great part about this thing) I bought new clothes. Then I dyed my hair blonde.. see where I'm going with this.
If your w is not going to respect your feelings, get yourself out of the house. Who wants to be watching 2 hrs of TV anyway? Shake it up a bit. GAL. Don't tell her where you are going. Take your S or go alone. No need to be cold about it, but you have things to do, places to be, people to hang out with. Have the mindset "Who cares what she's doing, you're awesome and people want to hangout with you!"
IMO - accepting the fact that w has an OW/PA/EA is extremely difficult. It brings up so many emotions. But if your goal is to get w back.. you need to stop fueling all fires that makes her run to OW and brings her back to you.
It may not seem like it, but you have an opportunity to take care of YOU. To find yourself, work on yourself, rediscover what makes you happy, try to change what makes you sad.
Even if you don't save m, you will save yourself. It may not be exactly what you want now, but it won't be a bad deal in the end.
(( ))
M(f): 40 D'ed: 8/12
Show empathy when there's pain. Show grace when warranted. Kindness in the midst of anger. Faith in the face of fear.
