I'm still here

[JustStunned]

DG, You can’t force him to make a decision he is not willing to make, just as you can’t make him want to reconcile.

You continue to hold out hope b/c it is what you want. It is perfectly normal, and you are not alone.

So when confronted with finalizing his decision he hesitates. It sounds like he is playing the victim. It is as if he wishes you to D him, so he can continue to be the victim.

If you’re not done then don’t.

Don’t file, don’t go back to him with expectations.

Walk away and build your life. He can’t keep being your victim if you’re off doing your own thing, living your own life. Sooner or later he’ll have to confront himself doing this to him to move forward. When he finally does maybe then he’ll want to reconcile, and if you do then great. You’ll both have a new relationship to work at. If not that is great too b/c you’re doing the work. You’re getting better.

We all backslide now and then. I had a few moments today.

You are too valuable to pine for the relationship that was. You’re not ready for the relationships yet to be. You’ll get there. Time and patience.