I have a question. When your h started showing interest in working on the relationship, what was some ot the things that he was doing. Lately mine has been joking around with me. Looking for me to start conversation and has been checking me out when he thinks that I don't know. Hasn't made any moves towards affection and I don't go to him. Did tell me out of the blue that he doesn't talk to his friend anymore and that he is home all the time and the only thing that he does is sit in the backyard listening to his music and watching the stars. I don't want to read anything into it because I can't get my hopes up. I have seen my old h for the last two weeks, someone I actually reconize. Any thoughts.
You posted for 25 yrs mlc - she might not be visiting my sitch .... ? Maybe make a new thread to call her to your attention?
Anyways:
Today is H's birthday.
With regards to touch and go's, he is in touch mode right now - talks to me, a bit more connected, although of course, nothing by way of bing affectionate or caring. Not that I expect any.
But its his birthday. I did buy him an expensive gift, actually two - one from me, one from D12. Thats a 180 for me because although I do like giving gifts, I am sort of cheap. H on the other hand does not gift much gifts but when he does, they are expensive.
I plan to put give him a card as well, with a very simple message, no mention of love, or whatever. Something one would give a dear friend.
I did give him a hug and a kiss on the cheek this moring. He left early to go hunting (1st day of dove season). He came back as I was leaving for the office at around 9:00 AM - I was all dressed in my pretty skirt and 4 inch heels, made up and all but I sat with him for a few minutes in our backyard and plucked feathers with my bare hands....while we exchanged pleasantries about how well he did, how he got the limit in 20 mins while the other hunters hadn't shot any (H is very good), and how plump the doves were (he will cook them later).
I asked him a few days back if he would like to do anything today, he said probably eat out, but he declined when I volunteered to be the one to reserve for him.
So my frineds, what doyou think? Am I doing OK, or too available?
Me:49 H:45 D:12 M:14 T:18 Bomb: 6/26/10 EA: 9/3/10, fizzled out slowly, now ??? 11/5/11 Retrouvaille Finally piecing.... Its peaceful at last, but we got a looong way to go
We did have a good weekend, with relatives here. Lots more of touch and goes, and even some show of concern from H.
Problem though is my D seems depressed again.
She was crying last night, again. She is now feeling the burden of knowing and growing too fast. Darn it. She's too young to be seeing all of lifes negatives.... I wish that all the selfish men and women out there think of how their decisions affect the most vulnerable of all .... our kids.
I also feel guilty, I should have protected her more from the knowledge of all this. But she was so perceptive that she knew right away we had a problem, even before I told her anything. She actually was the one who aproached me to let me know she knew about OW.
Me:49 H:45 D:12 M:14 T:18 Bomb: 6/26/10 EA: 9/3/10, fizzled out slowly, now ??? 11/5/11 Retrouvaille Finally piecing.... Its peaceful at last, but we got a looong way to go
your d is running too much of this. She has to own her own life and I'm not convinced it's all about you and h.
She has other issues at school, right? I mean what kid at that age wants to move?
It can't just be you guys & the turmoil, but that is easier for her to deal with than her own issues.
Plus, assuming she doesn't do any more negative acting out, she can and will recover herself when YOU recover yourself.
She's watching you. So model for her what GAL and 180s are.
Teach her that we are all in charge of our own happiness and no other person can deeply affect it for long. Model that.
How is your GAL anyhow?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
