Welcome to the boards. I am sorry that you have found yourself here.
Reading your posts, reminded me very much of the beginning of my own situation. Especially the part about being great friends, hanging out, etc...
Only do what you can handle emotionally.
My STBX, told me he would probably call me every night for hours after he moved out, even though he couldn't talk to me living in the house. He still invites me to family functions and it took him 3 years to tell the first person in his family and 4 years to finally tell the last one. My family knew right from the start. However, it was his family and I believed that he needed to be the one to share the news.
When I decided it was time to go dark, I responded to contact but I didn't initiate unless it was regarding S. That had nothing to do with him or his reaction and was entirely about me needing to detatch to get my head back together.
I know his moving is scary.
It may seem like a bad thing, but it doesn't have to be.
Please don't be surprised if you also find it a bit of a relief after a little time has passes. The stress level changes and becomes more managable. And then you become comfortable.
The stages are guidelines and the timelines are not accurate, so please don't get too hung up on that part of it.
This is something that takes time, and time really is your friend.
Be patient with yourself this weekend and in the weeks to come, keep posting, there is great support around here, although it can be a little slow at times, and be the best mom you can to your boys. You set the example for them right now.
Read what you can about MLC, relationships, depression, communication styles...There is no right or wrong in when you read what. Down the road, you may revisit things and they will make more sense then. Also, read something NOT related to relationships. We all need a break from time to time.
I've been around the boards a long time (I had a different posting name for a while) and I won't get into the gory details of my sitch, they are here if you feel like looking for them, but I can tell you, DB works. It works in our lives in ways that are hard to imagine at first. It doesn't always reconcile the M, but it works as a great way to live and be. So try not to get discouraged if you don't see the "results" you are looking for right away...
Especially with MLC, there are no guarantees.
Keep posting, others will be around...
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
