One thing that worries me is that you have continued to resist setting up a clear and defined financial plan with your W. By the looks of this. It would most definitely take a L involved. The "loan" thing will not hold up.
I sense you resist from fear of causing problems.
But this informal plan is doing nothing but causing problems.
Especially considering your past, and your W's resentment of you regarding finances.
You're right that I may need the lawyer's involvement in this. Just like our parenting plan, which she refused to sign, our financial plan cannot be readily solved by an informal agreement. Besides touching bases with my lawyer, this is what I might end up writing my wife (unless the lawyer has other suggestions):
"Wife, I see your concern on the payment issue. I gather that you do not want to pay any more monthly bills, especially those pertaining to E. To that I'd like it if we can sit down some time to figure a more amicable solution. Alamo"
