I am so proud of your son, that despite going through all this you raised a proud man who is every bit as good as the old block. I can't truly relate (yet) as my son is just hitting 2 in January, but I can't wait to experience his accomplishments and triumphs as he grows up whether I get to do so with his mother or not. It's a triumph to know that no matter what, as a man we kept our eye on the prize to make our children better people than we could be and as your son goes off to do his duty, I can't help but salute you on a job well done (and yes, I am aware the job isn't entirely finished.)
TM, I have no doubt that your on your own coaster this week (and it's only Tuesday!) I agree completely with CS, this is just one setback, not the final curtain.
Take a little time to process all the emotions I'm sure are swimming inside of you. Feel them, experience them, whatever you do don't ignore them.
You will be fine, that I think we can both agree on!
Me 43 W 38 M 5 T 7 SD20 S15, S13 with 1st W ILYBNILWY June 2010 Separation/Bomb July 2010 Divorce Feb 8, 2011
My attorney told me that about 20% of her divorce cases never finish to the end.... so there is still hope if you want it.
It really stinks the way she informed you. That's not right at all.
We will all get through this together.
Me: 43 W: 37 Together: 18 M: 15 D: 8 yrs old ILYBNILWY: March 2011 She Filed for D: August 2011 She moved out: Sept 1, 2011 Reconciled: May 2012 Divorce Case dropped: July 2012
I think your response was a good one. I just wonder if after last week, with the tearful meeting at your house and then asking you to brunch, if she was trying to get some sort of reaction out of you with her email (we women play silly mind games like that sometimes). Did she even mention that she was planning to file when you saw/spoke to her last? And gee whiz...nice timing on her part (NOT) right when she had to know you were feeling a little sad/lonely about your son leaving for boot camp. Not respectful, not nice and NOT cool. I speak with experience when I say filing for divorce means squat in the grand scheme of things. Heck, my husband has filed 3 times now, and I'm still married! It's just A piece of paper, not THE (final) piece of paper. Keep your heart and mind open to God's will. He will always lead you the right way. Hang in there. Love and hugs, lc4
Honestly, I think God is leading me away from this mess. If she were simply living on her own, or even with a female roommate, I'd be DBing my butt off. But for her to invite the OM to move cross-country to live with her and then try to tell me "Oh, we're just friends" is more than I'm willing to stand for and shows me she is someone who has no desire to save the marriage.
In the last 6 months I've made plenty of mistakes and maybe those mistakes accelerated her actions. But she has never looked back as she has sped away. I'm letting her go.
H 56 W 48 D27,S21 SS25 SS22 Severely autistic M(#2 for both) 9 1/2 yrs. "I've never loved you" 3/7/2011 Separated 8/7/2011 BITS
It's just A piece of paper, not THE (final) piece of paper. Keep your heart and mind open to God's will. He will always lead you the right way.