Do what I can but still have questions 3

[soccerwife]

Chaos, I asked that question and he said he does care about me but he knows he has not been there for me for some time and is sorry about that. He said that is part of the reason he wants out - he can't be there for me and knows I deserve it. I don't understand any of this. He is so confused and refuses to search for the answers, just blames me.

F.G., you are right, I should have had a plan on how to react before I walked through the door. and there were moments (at least a dozen) where my brain told me to leave the room, go to bed, cut off the conversation, but I just kept getting sucked back in by his responses. However, if I hadn't blown up, I don't think he would have agreed to try to figure this out. He will never be able to figure it out on his own and he will ruin our family in the process. I really believe that MC intervention is the only way for him to get past all the *&%( that he has hidden inside over the years.

About me getting into a position where I am the one who wants to file for D...I have noticed that happens on here quite a bit. What is that about? How does that happen? Is it the distancing/detaching? Or is it we just can't handle their baggage anymore and we become too strong, independent, and happy on our own?