We discussed my past relationships and how they ended, which has lead me to believe that I am not good with relationships. Correction: up until this point, I have not been good with relationships. I haven't had too many relationships in general, I was with my XH since 11th grade until my mid 20's and dated someone else in between dating my H.
My C asked me to think about this. Instead of thinking that I am not good at relationships, maybe I just had bad partners? The example she used was what if I took up tennis lessons. I practiced, learned some strokes, and then played on a doubles team. Every single match we lost, so I quit tennis because I am not good at it. I run into my coach about 2 weeks after I quit and he asks me "Why did you stop playing?" And I say "because I wasn't good at it. I suked and we never won a match." And my coach says "No, DG. You are a good tennis player, you just had bad partners."
Does that make sense? Obviously she isn't suggesting that I have not contributed to the issues in my relationships that I have been involved in that ended, but she wanted me to look at it as I didn't have the right partners.
It really has given me something to think about.
Thoughts?
"Everyone you meet has baggage. Find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack." ¤Formerly DelinquentGurl¤
