I do appreciate your feedback very much. Everyones. Yes, I do believe he is stalling. I wanted to believe it was because he doesn't want to D but yes his actions show otherwise.
I am done pretending. Done letting him pretend.
He does play the victim. Yes, he I believe he is turning it around on me that I can't forgive so in the end it can't work. I do agree that is a weakness of mine-holding a grudge- and I have worked on that. But, that is no reason to destroy a family IMO. I think because of this I held on a little longer hoping he would see my changes.
I guess the reason I saw hope is because of how miserable he was. Or, maybe he is a good actor. I saw remorse.
He is no way ready to address the drinking-"he doesn't have a drinking problem". I believe he feels tremendous guilt for what he has done. But, not enough to make things right.
Does he think he will just live happily ever after with OW? DOes he think she is the answer?
When we argued in the past it was usually just him retreating and not talking. Very rarely any yelling. He was typically very sarcastic and condensceding. Hard to live with. Even my oldest has said that. NOthing was ever good enough it seemed.
Why do I want that back? I don't know. I want my family together. I am willing and have taken responsibility for my part and am willing to do work. He isn't. So that is that.
