The Final Chapter

[25yearsmlc]

Tel,

re the "Date", since it's not like going to a bar or a party where some OW doesn't know what's going on -this woman does know, right?

So, I'm on the side of "Why not go?"

Hey, no one here will judge you going out or staying home. It's your call.

But You're allowed to feel attracting and attracted and attractive...you are not

obligated to wait at home for...anything or anyone.

So how's that GAL stuff going?

Would having the pleasant company of a woman who knows the dealio, and likes you anyway, help?

[ncl]

Tel,

re the "Date", since it's not like going to a bar or a party where some OW doesn't know what's going on -this woman does know, right?

So, I'm on the side of "Why not go?"

Hey, no one here will judge you going out or staying home. It's your call.

But You're allowed to feel attracting and attracted and attractive...you are not

obligated to wait at home for...anything or anyone.

So how's that GAL stuff going?

Would having the pleasant company of a woman who knows the dealio, and likes you anyway, help?

^^^^^^^^
MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY!

[~¤DG¤~]

jb, I'm doing surprisingly OK. Refer to the above post for further details. And check FB.

Do you feel comfortable being friends on FB? If so, let me know. I think you can see my email address.

[Telemark]

You're all just awesome...

25 & lc4, thank you for your encouragement. She knows the whole gory story and we have already talked about the fact that neither of us is ready for anything more than just good company. She's been divorced for several years and is very level-headed.

And my self-esteem could use some damage repair. It also doesn't hurt that she is a tall good-looking redhead.

DG, that would be great. Not sure about the e-mail reference. Clue me in...

[Telemark]

I just got a weepy phone call from my W…it’s 10:30 here; she is usually in bed by now.

She sounded terrible. She apologized for the hell she has put me through, for all the pain she has caused everybody, for her words and actions…she said she has no idea what she is doing, she is running out of money (didn’t quite plan this move too well, I see), she’s not sleeping…

..and..the OM’s mother? She is 71 and along with all of her other health issues, she has a broken collarbone. And she is still moving out here next week.

I just listened and said I was sorry she was going through such a rough time. I offered nothing.

But it does hurt to hear her in such pain, even with everything that has happened.

[Denver_2010]

I just got a weepy phone call from my W…it’s 10:30 here; she is usually in bed by now.

She sounded terrible. She apologized for the hell she has put me through, for all the pain she has caused everybody, for her words and actions…she said she has no idea what she is doing, she is running out of money (didn’t quite plan this move too well, I see), she’s not sleeping…

..and..the OM’s mother? She is 71 and along with all of her other health issues, she has a broken collarbone. And she is still moving out here next week.

I just listened and said I was sorry she was going through such a rough time. I offered nothing.

But it does hurt to hear her in such pain, even with everything that has happened.

My guess is that this is only the beginning Telemark. JMO.

Denver

[♪CS♪]

Tele

I have generally been reading along. And I got caught up with the recent events.

This last 'bomb' was very similar to one I had recently. For me. I also learned W was moving in with OM.

So I understand your feelings very well.

For me. It was similar. 'I'm done"

But think about what this means.

I found. It meant I was done chasing. I was done trying to convince. I was done holding on. And hope is a strange word. Can mean many things. But for me. It meant I was done holding onto it. Does that make sense? Hope can exist. But it is a matter of what we do with it. Hold on? Or just let it exist.

Tele. You can use this in a few different ways. A realization of what is at the moment. And then move clearly with that knowledge.

Or you can dwell. What was. What is, and resist. What will be. And be fearful.

I suggest. Take what is. And I know. It [censored]. But it is.

Don't resist. And act accordingly based on the reality.

As long as you continue to act with love. Compassion. And strength.

This reality will work WITH it. And make your path clear.

Be well man.

[~¤DG¤~]

I meant I think you can see my email address in my profile so you can email me your info so you don't need to post it on here.

As for your W calling...wow. Of course you don't want to think about her hurting or in pain, you love her. We can't just flip a switch and stop loving someone (although at times I wish it were possible).
She made these choices, she needs to live with them

Do what's best for you Telemark.

[jbnati]

She sounded terrible. She apologized for the hell she has put me through, for all the pain she has caused everybody, for her words and actions…she said she has no idea what she is doing, she is running out of money (didn’t quite plan this move too well, I see), she’s not sleeping…

Hmmm.....Big surprise here.... Actually it is a bit of surprise, because the WAW script is to hide these things. Maybe your throwing down the gauntlet (and I know it was no tactic) had something to do with this. Here goes the express elevator downward.

I just listened and said I was sorry she was going through such a rough time. I offered nothing.

IMO you handled this perfectly.

Who knows what direction this is ultimately heading?

I think the ball's in her court now. It's going to be her 180 to do.

Praying for you, man.

[25yearsmlc]

Wow

The fast track down the elevator to hit bottom, IS REALLY FAST these days.

She called you to say her life sukks and she's sorry for all the pain she's caused. and I'm shocked, SHOCKED I TELL YOU...

Alright, sorry for the jokes. Except I'm only a little sorry b/c humor on the DB site often saved me from a miserable time.

Seeing the wacky MLC behaviors - even the sad tear filled calls, Or the angry spewing, all the wacky stuff is just so damn predictable, it's now, officially, cliched. Good grief, none of this occurred to her BEFORE now?
Still, she has had a glimpse of the pain and damage SHE has and IS inflicting.

Yes, despite the nightmare aspects, this IS a "positive". Don't lose sight of that.
Anyhow, YOU did well Tel, as well as anyone with 2 seconds notice could have. And as usual, you held onto your dignity and quiet strength.

The vengeance part of you, which is small or non-existent in you, could have said "W, these are called consequences..." but nope, not you! You didn't point out consequences b/c you are a great man AND b/c You don't have to.

I love the love you show her, even as she wounds you.
I admire the strength you continue to discover within.

When the dust settles, you are going to be soooo much more than alright.
But for now, it's dusty. And it hurts. Sorry for that, Tel.

Continue to hold your head high.

You'll never regret being a man of honor and strength

or treating her with respect she may not always deserve, b/c of who you are (or have become?) YOU will have no regrets. I'm proud of you.

Hang in there, & Save your strength for what I think is coming...Soon.
Big Hugs my friend
((( )))

PS

The more I hear, the more I am sorry about the OM's mom. God help her. That's just a sad part of this for which there are no jokes. Hope things for HER work out somehow...no matter what else goes on. And SS...
SIGH...