I don't know, Shiny...he's so, well...matter of fact about it all now. I know he feels guilty, but that's not the same as feeling remorse as that would be more about my feelings than all those "bad boy mea culpas" you know what I mean?
Argh....I had hella bad nightmares last night. I could clearly see a conversation Wolfie was having with OW. This dream did feel like the ones I had last year--the ones that were real. With those kind of dreams, it is hard to tell the walking nightmare from the sleeping nightmare.
I sometimes wish I wasn't one of those who has those kind of gifts. I know that my spiritual beliefs are not the typical belief system that most people here have, and maybe it makes me seem off my nut to those who aren't of my culture. Still, in the surrounding communities I am known very differently than I am on this bb.
There are "medicine women" just as there are "medicine men" and some call me that openly. It has to do with feeling a death about to occur before it does and seeing things that are hidden. It also has to do with a gift that very few have...the ability to hear and sometimes see the ones in the spirit world.
It is embarrasing to talk of these things--it is not something that isn't spoken about openly as it sounds like bragging when the gifts are not something that makes one special---it is from the Creator and therefore is very humbling. I have a feeling that you will understand what I am saying, though, and not think I'm just some crazy Indian woman, because you have some of these gifts I'm speaking of too. I also think that you know there is a connection between the woman you met in the bar that night--right after your bomb--and me coming to this board. Does that make any sense to you?
