Thanks, jb & DG. I always look forward to your replies (even if they are short, DG!)
jb, you make a good point - apathetic or ambivalent? Honestly, frankly, truthfully: right now I have no desire to be married to my W. She does not love me, respect me or trust me. She has no physical desire for me. She has, to borrow a line from the book I'm currently reading, "stabbed my heart so many times I don't know which hole to plug first". She has crippled me emotionally and financially.
Who needs that?
And what I'm finding out is that she has done that all of her life; just run away from anything that needs to be worked on. She has been the victim of abandonment so she is going to beat anyone else to the punch.
And yet, I just can't bring myself to take the next step to end things. So I guess that means God is directing me to hang in there and wait. And wait. And wait.
H 56 W 48 D27,S21 SS25 SS22 Severely autistic M(#2 for both) 9 1/2 yrs. "I've never loved you" 3/7/2011 Separated 8/7/2011 BITS
