Tal, It's wonderful that Wolfie has come full circle. It's not likely that it will happen again. Like you said, you've both done some real soul searching, and I'm sure he wonders about his temporary insanity almost as much as you do. It's good it only lasted a year (not to minimize it!). My H has been in his insanity for over 4 yrs if you count the time he was in the A, and of course you have to count that. It's been two yrs last October since he leftthe first time, and I wonder if he'll ever snap out of this totally. Why can't he see that we belong together-not living apart. This is so hurtful to me that he does not want to come home and be my husband full time. I've not said one word about the OW, but one wonders if she's totally out of the picture if he's still so uncertain of what he wants. He tells me he loves me. What does that mean to him? Does he think we can live this way indefinately? This whole mess has been as clear as mud to me. I'm tired of waiting for him to want me enough to come home. He's not being as sexual as he normally would be. Don't know what that's about either. My mind wanders into territory I don't want to visit. I've asked many on here what they did to make thier S start pursuing them. The answer is that they backed off. They were loving, but did not call them or try to makes dates. I'm wondering if that's what I should do. My H just seems so nonchalant about our R. He is nice and says ILY,but the passion is not there-the real desire to be with me. Could he still be in withdrawal from OW? Or worse yet, in contact with her? I talk to him every night before bed, so I know he's at home. Ii guess if he wanted to see her,he'd find the time and I wouldn't know about it. I didn't before, why should now be any different? I guess all this comes from his lack of enthusiasm about us. He's ok with us together, but what can I do to step it up a notch?? You've been there Tal. What advise can you give me? I want him to come to his senses and realize what he'd be losing if he lost me. Keep up that positive attitude-you're doing great and you are loved! Rachael
