H got me in a corner and started R talk. I got really honest with him and I told H that I was considering filing for D and he hit the roof. Like it was out of nowhere or an outrage or something. I basically told him that I knew he was with a new woman and that this is it for me. I told him that I have to protect myself and that I have a life to live. He agreed, but still seems as confused as he did on D-Day #1. He told me again that he wants to be with me, thinks about me constantly, etc. etc.
I asked is this before, after or during your time with OW?
He just got very quiet and then told me about how hurt he is and how hard this is for him and how connected he is to me and how he can't live with the thought of me out of his life.
I told him that I didn't know what to say but he has to know that I'm not going to live in this limbo forever.
He said, "I don't want you to wait for me. Go out and live your life."
Then he proceeded to tell me that it hurts him to think of me with other men and that if I ever date this one particular guy who's always been interested in me that he will explode. And then....
Do I even need to go on? Can I join the WTF bus?
Me: 33, H: 32 M: 12 years T: 13 years No kids D-Day: 7/2009 Separated: 10/12/10 Future Unknown GITS
"There's a fire starting in my heart, reaching a fever pitch and it's bringing me out the dark." - Adele
