Can my blah blah blah?

[~¤DG¤~]

I'm glad you had fun with your friends tonight. Way to go!

Hopefully, once all of H's stuff is out you'll be able to start healing.

[a girl]

Thanks, DG. Woke up with a migraine, but I think it's from the red wine last night - had 3/4 of a glass - I'm a lightweight.

Feeling a bit better now - trying to gear up to go buy a new battery for my watch.

[a girl]

H dropped S7 off at 5pm today - he had sent mail last night asking if he could not keep him until 7 on Saturdays, as it prevents him making any dinner plans on the weekend. I had replied and said 5 would be fine, but not knowing if he would see the email, wasn't sure when they would be here. No big deal - could have texted to ask, just didn't care to interact with him. Chose to just be home by 5.

Also requested that H leave some boxes so I could pack up his books, etc. Asked him to stop coming into the house and taking things without telling me.

H - "I'm sorry, did I take anything you need, or need me to bring back?"

Me - "No, but you took more than we discussed - serving dishes and what not. I just don't like coming home and finding you've been here without telling me."

H - "I'm sorry. I won't do it again."

He seemed contrite, although probably he was just in a hurry to placate me and leave.

Regardless, I'll pack up his things and hopefully we can end this soon.

[~¤DG¤~]

It is a good idea to set that boundary, and I hope he abides by it.

[jbnati]

I think it's a pretty reasonable boundary. Good for you! He chose this mess, and it really not his home anymore, IMO.

[a girl]

Had a good nights sleep last night - had a dream that H wanted to get back together, and I tried, but was miserable - so I asked him to leave.

Not sure how to take that.

Spent the morning hanging out with S7 - he likes to lay in bed and read and watch movies on Sunday morning. He's always been a very affectionate child, but it's really amped up since H moved out - he doesn't like to not be around me, and is particularly clinging on Saturday nights/Sunday morning (probably from being away from me overnight) - my lawyer thinks he wants to be around me to make sure I don't leave like his dad did. That makes me sad.

[paige40]

How often does S7 go with his dad? That makes me sad too.

[a girl]

Paige - he currently sees his dad on Mon-Wed for a few hours - H picks him up from daycamp around 5 and keeps him until 8pm. On Fridays, he picks him up but keeps him overnight until 5pm on Saturday. The other days (Sun, Tues, Thurs), I have S7 and H calls to say goodnight.

H is wanting to head toward a 3 days with him, 4 days with me scenario, but looking at how S7 acts, and talking with him, I don't think a scenario where he's away from either of us that long is the right choice.

One of my close friends has a schedule similar to the one we currently have, but her H keeps the kids overnight on his M-W, as well as Friday - that's the scenario I'm considering, but I'd like to watch S7 a bit longer before suggesting any sort of change (since it's only been 2.5 weeks that he's been doing this).

[Telemark]

"Had a good nights sleep last night - had a dream that H wanted to get back together, and I tried, but was miserable - so I asked him to leave."

Funny...I was thinking about what it would be like to get back together with my W, and I came to the same conclusion; I think it would be a train wreck.

Does his mean we have reached the summit of detachment?

I'm sorry to read about how your S is having a tough time. I think you are wise in keeping his visits with your H and you short so he is not away from either of you for a long time. I also think that a longer visit with either of you would result in a difficult transition back to the other parent.

[a girl]

Happy Monday! Or something. S7 was pretty tired this morning and hard to wake up - he said, "I think I deserve a day off". He's funny.

Back at work today! Need to take some refi papers to my loan officer - very nice guy, also went through a pretty terrible divorce, complete with his wife's affair, about 10 year ago - we've bonded over how crazy spouses can be.