My job started this past Friday. It is going to be hard work, but it is honest work. I think I will like it. Plus, it is not radio which is what W and I both wanted. I'm just tired of that whole lifestyle.
I've had a rough couple of days. I just have a hard time believing that my marriage could be over in 54 days when we go to court. She is still so determined to go through with this. She won't even consider a delay and says that I'm not even entitled to ask for one.
I have not spoken to her since Wednesday. It has been nice, but I'll be honest, I have missed her terribly the last few days. I have been trying my best to just keep quiet and lay low.
She did not take S16 this weekend because she said that she had a lot of school work to take care of. Of course because she has told so many lies, I don't know if she is telling the truth or not.
Brooklyn, I hope you had a great birthday! In my last thread you said:
Quote:
Maybe she is saying you're fake because your changes arent real. They know if they are, you know.
While this may be true, could it also be projection? Right now, she is the "fakest" person I know trying to be like everyone else. She did say this to me about a month ago: "you've changed towards everyone else, but not me."
???
AJ, you also said on my last thread:
Quote:
She is starting to flail to get your attention. Why? Because the dynamic changed. It changed because you changed it.
I don't understand. I don't believe she is trying to get my attention. As for the dynamic, how has it changed?
Even though I miss her (or the person she was) so bad and would love for her to come back, it is not as bad as it was. I don't feel like my happiness depends on it. Make sense?
I really wish I could wake up from this nightmare.
Thanks for everything.
Tad
Currently: M 56 XW 57 Sons 38,33,31,29
The Sitch: Married 26 years EA w/ OM 9/10 Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary) Sep 12/10 She wants D 1/11 W files 5/11 D final 10/11 XW marries OM 6/13
