what DB approach do you feel you've been doing and for how long?
I mean no offense but to ME, it seems you have not DBd for more than a day or two before you'
"lose it" again or "can't help" yourself. As someone here posted, "Women are attracted to strong men. Strong men control their emotions, not other people."
You continue to want to force results rather than simply being the best man you can be and leaving the results up to God.
You don't sound in control of yourself at all.
IMO, when someone isn't in control of their emotions or words or actions
it's a bad time to make big decisions.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
btw, you don't actually "KNOW" that she's with him now anyhow, correct?
And is it true or not, that the only answer you'll actually believe, is "yes she is"?
See, it's a bit of a lose lose for her. On one hand, You want her to be honest...BUT....otoh you can't handle the truth even if the truth is that she's NOT seeing him...
I can imagine her saying (and meaning it)
that she's taking a break from him AND you,
to clear her head...THEN
you'll be the one pressuring her...(which we actually "KNOW" she does not want.)
Don't rush your decision.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
There are many times that I wish we all could get together and have coffee and could really talk. Although this bb has been a real god send and been a great source of support, really, a huge part of the communication is missing. Much is lost in trying to convey the message, and much is lost in what message is received. Therein lies the problem too with how my wife chooses to communicate with me, and with her friends. It is my belief that E Com can never replace Real Com(face to face).
I have looked to see if I can find a separated persons support group, but I haven't found one yet in my city.
Anyways, I want you to know, message received. Apart from my email question to her, yesterday, I will not make any hasty decisions, without talking them through here first. I appreciate all the advice...
Johnnie
Me 45 W 34 W.A.W. 3K. D11 S9 D6 M 12 y T 13 y Bomb drop 02/22/2011 2nd written bomb (Letter bomb) 05/31/2011 Affair (A bomb) revealed 07/03/2011
How should I let her know that I support her in getting a painter job?
I want to be supportive. She has been distant emotionally and physically for that last day after my question to her about OM.
Johnnie
You don't support it from what you have said. So don't lie.
From what I can tell from this post. You don't want to support her at all. You want her to give YOU support.
And you're hoping there are some words you can use to get it.
Johnie, do you get THIS^^^ message from Country Song?
it's very important that you understand his post.
Do you?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
"I think I have had enough. I cant take her actions any more. furthermore, I will not be able to live with a constant reminder of her infidelity every day when she goes off to work as a painter.
I think it is time for me to tell her that if this is the path she wants. she needs to go. I am done."
This is your idea of support?
H 56 W 48 D27,S21 SS25 SS22 Severely autistic M(#2 for both) 9 1/2 yrs. "I've never loved you" 3/7/2011 Separated 8/7/2011 BITS
