After 2.5 years, divorce final soon

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Denver: It is hard trying to live without control. Without having your "plan" Even after the W left, I still continued with my same methodology. It is all I ever knew. I even went away to college when I was 17, never came home after. Had to get my apartment when I got out and live my singles life in Chicago...I met my W the first night in chicago...

Gabby: You are right too. I have never really been alone either. The thing that I realized is that I need to be whole on my own before I can be whole with someone else. The problem is that I did meet the right girl at the wrong time.


Your ExH will find out really soon that he jumped into things way too quickly. You are very wise in waiting to date until you are emotionally ready. Most guys run so fast to find someone to make them feel good about themselves. They don't really no it at the time. They think they are past everything. The problem is their journey is just beginning although they don't know it. And no one can tell them different.

So what do I do now...I don't want to end the relationship either. I tried letting her go once and I was a mess. I do know it was partly because I had a hard time being alone. But also partly that this person I met is a true partner. The one you take walks with, play tennis, golf with, a best friend. So I can't just walk away even though I am not truly ready for everything.

My divorce is final in a week and I am looking forward to finally putting all this behind me. It has been a journey.

Denver: I hope you make it through better than I did. I have good weeks and bad weeks. Everytime I think I'm good...I find that I still have a long way to go.

Deliquent: I plan on learning from alot of people on this site about a second marriage. I don't want to play the statistic that 60% of second marriages end in divorce. I can't go through this again. I wouldn't wish divorce on my worst enemy. I feel for you going through it a second time. But it sounds like you have learned some lessons this time. I certainly have in this divorce. And am learning alot right now about myself.

Well, I coach my son's football team and I am off to a game. Thanks for your replies. I am really glad I found this site. I always think I am good and I don't need to come back, but every few months I find myself still needing the support. It is great to hear the success stories. But as we probably have all found it is about helping you prepare for life after divorce...