Longtime lurker, first time poster...

[soccerwife]

Just by the way you write this, I can tell you have it in you.

Give one of your personal behavior goals another try. If a week is too long, try it for three days. After you make it three days, add two more days. It may take a couple tries, but you can do it.

When I first started, I was lucky to make it three days (I was all or nothing in the beginning and my head was spinning trying to make all of the changes at once and in some respects, I am sure it made me look insane to my H).

One last piece of advice, and this was given to me on a number of occasions until it sunk in. You can't make him decide if he is willing to work on M or not. He has to do this on his own time. But you can influence his decision by being the best you possible, the woman he fell in love with. If you are that woman, then the OW doesn't stand a chance... right? There simply won't be any comparison.