Walking in Muskeg - Part IV - Squishy Rubber Boots

[angel61]

SC,

I like the way you have objectively analyzed and dissected your M. I have always thought though that your view was "dark", a but your last post changed that, as I could see the ray of sunshine, literally, in how you describe the picnic, and te ligtness of your heart when your H did good things for you. Admittedly, I don't follow your story too closely as sometimes they made me depressed, or maybe it was because it made me squirm, like seeing myself in front of a mirror and not liking what I see.

I hope there will be more pleasant afternoons coming your way. We have many of those too, in my sitch, and I just hope that it might lead to a love which we possibly never had before... but to think about it, all the elements for one is there -

I myself was starting to think that my H too has really never loved me, but a friend of mine pointed out that what we did not have was romantic love, rather than just not having any love at all. And when OW came along and he felt romantic love, he now thinks that is the only love there is and thinks that our M was a lie, thus rewriting our history. I told him it could not be a lie because at the time we were married, we both earnestly believed in it, and worked hard at making our life together a good one. I also acknowledged that things could change. I told him that it was unfair for our D12 to look back and think that her childhood was an unhppy one, and that we should emphasize the good times for her sake. Since then, I noted that H has stopped rewriting and actually brings up good moments every now and then when we are all sharing stories with friends and family!