Chaos: Well, I guess I can understand that when you put it that way. The thing is, it's not like I talked with her at length on the subject. Whenever she said wonderful things about OM, I honestly didn't say anything much back to her. I'm just not sure how I can set a boundary without me somehow letting her know that he bothers me. Any ideas on this are greatly appreciated. If there's some way I can avoid talking about OM with her or having him in the same room while she's speaking to me, I'm all ears.
Having thought about it a bit on my mid-day run, I never feel that my W is "waving" OM in my face or trying to purposely hurt my feelings. Instead, I get the very strong feeling that she's trying to justify what she's doing with him to anybody who will listen, including myself. I had the same exact feeling when she told me about all of his AMAZING qualities when her A first began: like she was justifying out loud. It's almost like, if she were really a rational person during this time, she would understand on a very basic level that saying this kind of stuff to an ex would be incredibly hurtful. It only reinforces in my mind just how messed up she is right now.
I guess, if we get to the point where she wants to really get the D going and that she's leaving me for OM, I would have to communicate to her that I would be at the point where I just couldn't be "friends" with her any longer. That if she really thinks that OM is all she needs, then it shouldn't matter much if I withdraw from her life. Yeah. Somehow, I feel quite comfortable with that ultimatum. It would be one that I would feel very much at home.
