I tried calling D8 last night and the phone was "busy" from 8:00p 'til at least 9:45p.
Pretty standard stuff between my W and FS16, I would say one of them was on the phone during that period of time.
So, I let it sit for the night.
LP, I really appreciate your input. What you say is very valid and the kids are so very important to me, I will always do what I can for them.
I'm also almost surprised that we haven't heard from someone who had been through this kind of thing as a child, and how it affected them.
Analysis paralysis, I could see that being an issue. Something that I had a propensity for, in the past. Years and years ago. Before I even met my W. Not who I am and not how I have operated for over 15 years.
The gut honest truth here? Before I even posted this, the very first time this came up with my W, the reality is... I don't know if I would make it through the evening. Even an hour... Regardless if the IL's and my W's friends, were there.
Could I TRY? Sure, I could try.
I am 100% sure that I am not yet detached enough.
And I WILL NOT risk an otherwise pleasant (as can be, under the circumstances) day for my D8, because I might have an emotional melt down...
If D8 picks up anything from ANYONE, it would be from me.
So the 10 minutes it took for me to read your post LP, and for me to write a portion of this post... it became very clear that I am not ready for this, yet.
How do I explain THAT to my W? Without it coming across as pursuing?
How do I explain that to D8, without her feeling down about it...
I can choose to tell them the gut honest truth, or I can simply tell them that this year... I am not prepared to have combined parties...
All I can do is hope to do the LEAST harm, by the choice I make. Protect D8 from me, and my emotions.
