Do for yourself. Do what will help you heal. Your H sounds about as angry as my W. This is something that is impossible to fight. Yes, your marriage is over just the same as mine. Work on accepting that as a fact. Will things ever change and your H loses some of that anger. Probably not unless "He" decides to do the work.
Please, Please think about yourself.
I hurt too sometimes. My wife was my best friend for 28 yrs. The one I trusted most in my life. I did ask in the beginning how she could do that to me. I was asking the wrong question, but it took time to realize that.
You can't fight MLC, you can't fight anger, you can't fight craziness. So guess what? DON'T.
I think you understand. Hang in there. You will be fine.
