Is it true that You only want ONE TYPE of contact from her and that is full 100% committment to the m, . . .
He's already demonstrated this, and more importantly his wife has already told him this -- that this is the "pressure" she feels when they have their convos. Denver is wasting valuable time, in my opinion, ANALYZING all of the "why's" of this. If he continues to insist on operating on his FEELINGS, instead of on a PLAN, he will continue to push his wife away and not give her a chance to miss him and therefore change his mind.