I do harbor too many criticisms of her, you are correct. I wont go into too much detail, but I used to not help at all. Her standards used to be higher than mine but she blames me for making hers lower. I do need to lower what I think she can do based on being pregnant. She doesn’t work though, well kind of but it’s a job she is working on starting to make money on her own. I have been cleaning up the house each night after she leaves so she can start fresh with the kids in the morning. Even vacuuming and I never ever vacuum lol

As far as the temper, I don’t fly off the handle mad, but your right, I still react in a way that’s controlling and accusing, so even though I didn’t see it as being all over the place, I am.

She has stated that she is not seeing him or dating him til her and I figure out our issues and if we are going to try and stay together or not, so we are not piecing, but she is committed to me enough to where she is not going to date or be with anyone else til then.

Yes it’s a lose discussion for me for sure. And will push her closer to him and further from me. Just hard finding out your wife didn’t feel safe seeing me on her birthday, then seeing him and at a place I have always taken her.
I sent her a text saying nothing significant. Hopefully not repeating mistakes… lol