All of these different fears are still rooted in the same deep fear. The fear of D. The fear of your M being over.
The individual fears you list I see as more excuses for not facing the real fear.
You fear that if you detach you will not love her anymore. This isn't the case at all. I'm sure you know this. Detaching does NOT mean to stop loving.
You fear she will see no contact as the 'old Denver.'. But if you tell her WHY. This isn't a reasonable fear.
As long as you continue to be motivated by this fear. As long as you continue to work from this dark place you are. This will hurt you and your chances much more than contact or no contact.
Do what you need to do to fix ^^^^ this first.
And THIS is what I see in the advice from Starsky and MHL. It is the best way for YOU to be able to address this situation with a clear mind, conviction and strength.
BITS
Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
