As with the contact on Thursday and Friday, this leaves me wondering what is going through my W's head.
Our stitches are very similar Denver, T-9, M-2, no kids. Sorry this might be long, but I hope it is helpful as your thread is very helpful 4 me. I was fortunate to rid my W's anger @ me in about a month and half.
Sounds like the phone call went great and you listened.
As with whats going on in her head. Anything and everything you could possibly think about. I assure you.
Look the last two times I talked w/ my W our talks were suppose to be about legal and house talk, they were far from that, one convo lasted about 3 hrs, the other 4 hrs, a lot of relationship talk by her and even OM talk. It was hard 4 me. She even let it slip that she thinks about me all the time, its hard not to reach out and that she is losing not only me but her best friend. << Very hard to hear that.
After our last talk she left w/ OM on vacation. Go figure.
So yes ur W is thinking about you even if she doesn't reach out to you.
If it were me, I wouldn't read a whole bunch into what she is saying, content wise. But the fact that she is talking to you is good.
She obviously trusts you otherwise she wouldn't be talking about her life with you. But like you have said its a fine line, with dark and communicating.
But I am noticing a pattern that my W is taking.
My W does not respond well to text, email, phone calls, it allows her to be closed off, its easy for her to fake the conversation IMO.
I basically kill it if I am able to see her, I can get her to hug me, accept affection, joke with me and piss off OM @ the same time.
So keep on doing what ur doing. If convo is going good, IMO, continue it unless you feel like you are going round and round.
When was the last time u saw ur W? Sorry if this was covered in earlier threads but how close is she to you? Are there any mutual functions that you could show up w/ SS to help gauge her feelings for you?
Her nervousness may be in part that she is not too sure where you are at especially w/ OW in the picture. I know that may sound dumb. But look my W is the same way. They are not like us, where we make decisions and boom that is it. They base everything off what they are "feeling", whatever was said in the past by us, is irrelevant. Actions will show her ur still open.
Women need to be constantly reassured. It's annoying.
But if perhaps if you were able to see her @ a mutual function or even @ her house to get rid of the bugs, you could see if you could flirt w/ her a bit like its no biggie and see where you are at.
To me it sounds like she is srsly testing the waters, but it may be as soon as she knows ur open to R, she digs back in.
Though really until OM is out of the picture completely by either her choosing or OM choosing for her we stand little chance IMHO, no matter how friendly we are.
Don't beat urself up about the OW, but be honest w/ her, look it takes me a lot right now to not reach out to any woman, I mean it would a huge life raft for me, but it truly does complicates things.
No joke my IC told me a story of a guy he was counseling, wife left him for OM, tried to get his wife back, nothing worked, he ended up meeting OW & started to fall in love w/ her, W filed D.....no joke 1 week b4 their D the C told him to call his W to see if she was sure that this is what she wanted.........she said no, she wanted to work on M.
Me:29 WW:26 No kids 2 dogs T: 11 M: 2 D-day 1: 08/2010 D-day 2: 05/2011 1 POSOM Separated: 06/2011 WW ILY commits to M 9/18 Files D 9/19 ILY Still 9/21 WW are fun
