To DB, or not to DB, that is the question.

[soccerwife]

Hey Endeavor, thanks for posting on my thread...sometimes I feel like I just talk to myself all day long. I suppose my journaling is tedious. I have made some breakthroughs this week - not really sure if they are real or if I can trust them at all. I would like to but I am trying to have no expectations and be VERY patient (two virtues that have eluded me my entire life.

I like to read the sitches of those who post on my thread but I have rarely been brave enough to venture onto their threads and offer anything (I feel like too much of a novice and such a failure most of the time). Anyway, something on your very first post caught my eye. Aside from the fact that you obviously like to read R books, you mentioned that maybe you are co-dependent.

I have noticed that this topic has come up a number of times in this forum. I don't know a whole lot about what it means but I know that it carries negative connotations. I can remember watching Oprah 20 years ago and a couple on there talking about how to break free of codependency. Even then I thought it was a ridiculous notion to think it was bad for someone to depend on someone else for happiness. I certainly depend on my H for much of my happiness and I am not embarrassed by it at all. He makes me happy, especially when I make him happy. To me, that is what M is all about.

Anyway, I don't know if you have read it, but I just picked up a book my MC recommended, Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, by Dr. Sue Johnson. I think you would like it. Plus as I read from some of your descriptions of conversations with your H, this book could help you break out of the destructive loops couples get into.

Our H's have some similarities it sounds, we could trade stories. Hang in there.