hope you love her, cause you're stuck with her now

[oldtimer]

Sounds like XH was trying to do the decent thing and let you know that he plans to get engaged so that you wouldn't be surprised. Direct communication might have been better, but it was nevertheless kind of him to at least let you know through a friend.

Be safe in the park. I wouldn't go near it myself.

[jon2911]

That's crazy stuff!

Interesting about XH. Glad it didn't seem to affect you much.

[JCJ]

Hey Michelle,

I typed out a reply and then lost it!

It's not nice to hear that news about your exh from whatever source, and I think wherever you are in life then it's always going to feel strange and not that pleasant. Just take time to process the feelings which I am sure you are doing.

How are things now with the weirdo in the park? I hope all is ok.

[MichelleLT]

In a lot of ways, it doesn't. I don't want him back. I have no respect for him or faith in him as a person. I hope he's grown and learned, but frankly give this second marriage a snowball's chance in hell LOL.

At the same time, it makes me a bit nostalgic. I miss being able to have that faith and blind trust. I miss being married a lot still. But not enough to make me want to do it again! LOL

No more weirdo sightings. Things have been quiet.

Just busy with the house and work. I think Roger and I are gonna take a trip with the dog to Yosemite this weekend.

[mishka422]

Ahhh..Yosemite. Miss that. So beautiful and great hiking.

[Kalni]

Michelle, that blind trust is gone, I think from every single person on this and other similar forums no matter the outcome of our efforts. It's the saddest part for me...
(on the other hand, I do feel smarter, you know?)
Love
K

[MichelleLT]

I do feel smarter.

I don't feel like XH got smarter though. And I'd hate to see him repeat all of this trauma and drama with some other unsuspecting soul. I feel bad for her actually LOL.

[ClingingToHope]

I don't think anybody trusts like they did when they were in their 20s. I have a friend getting married and I see red flags flying all over, but all he sees is her beauty. Hey, they have a 50/50 chance, right?

[mishka422]

True. That blind trust is long gone but there has to be a happy medium between blind trust and never believing a word they say.

[AliSuddenly]

Hey Michelle..your exH is an idiot and yes, don't suppose it will last, but sort of nice of him to let you know, although cowardly to go through a mutual friend!

I had exs repeatedly lie and cheat on me in my 20's and I definetly had my barriers up when I met H, a thoroughly decent guy.. so for the first 5 years, I was the one wearing the trousers as essentially I was retaining control and not letting him in entirely.. looking back our R wasnt equal and so we werent able to be fully carefree and in love. We lived together but I dont think I mentally committed to him.. it took something bad in our R which shocked me before I could do that back around 2004.. and suddenly, the walls were down and the love I had for him was able to be fully expressed.

What I'm saying is, it kind of doesnt serve you, or your R to have that cautious lack of trust/faith, but I'm sure you will break past that wound and forget the past eventually, with the love of a decent man!