Yes, I think you're right, jbnati. I'm the one that is here but...
I'd really just like him to be a strong dependable man with some emotional strength already. Sigh.
I have read Sex Starved Marriage (as has he) and so I get the connection between my need for intimate conversation and his need for more sex. I don't feel safe and connected so I don't want lots of sex....he doesn't feel connected because he doesn't get his sexual needs met...and so on and so on.
I could seduce him I suppose (that wouldn't be hard) but I'm not sure it would be the right thing to do. It seems too much like pursuing. Honestly, I have no real desire to pursue and I'm the last person you will find begging or crying or pleading. Made all those mistakes 10 years ago and that will never happen again.
I've spoken to him about his drinking and he denies he has a problem. He claims he drank when I met him so I knew this....Yeah, but he was also 19 back then. Although, I have noticed that he hasn't had more than one drink with dinner lately, and on Sunday night he made a point of telling me he was only having one beer. I told him he didn't need my permission and that he was going to do what he was going to do.
I've said my piece about his drinking and I'm not bringing it up again because I'm not making it my problem. He wants to choose that for his life, then so be it.
