Preseason has begun...just trying to make the cut

[MadeToSucceed]

You basically gave her an ultimatum......are you ready to see that through?? I mean REALLY??

I did the same thing and I was not ready and I just came across as pathetic........

I guess I know I'm not "ready" for that but at the same time everything is pointing directly to that. In some ways I feel she needs to feel like I will move on with out her if that's what she is forcing me to.

You basically said come back to the marriage or that is it, you tried to use guilt from a biblical prespective.

She will use the bible to absolve herself of her sin......I mean that is what we are supposed to do right???

Look at it from her perspective.......if God forgives me then you should too, and if you don't then you are not being a good Christian.

I understand where you're coming from...but at the same time you're absolved of that sin when you repent for it and turn from it. I wasn't trying to guilt her...more than anything I was asking her to help me understand her own biblical perspective. I do forgive her. And I agree...so does God...but only when she asks for that forgiveness. The way I see it she'll use the Bible to RATIONALIZE what she's doing...i.e. "I can keep doing this because I know I'll be forgiven anyways." There's nothing "right" about that and I guess having just left the conference I had a tough time holding my tongue there.

So are you going to truly let her be and let go???

What does that look like??

I don't mean it like "let her be and let go" entirely. I still WANT to succeed with my wife but I can't DO anything to make that happen. So when I say "let it go" I mean in terms of me reaching out to her...particularly since we've now pretty much knocked out all the bills stuff. I mean what is left for me to say? She's made it painstakingly clear what her stance is and honestly she hasn't deviated from it too much.

I really hope I'm not coming off as combative MHL...I fully understand what you're saying and appreciate your words of support more than you know. I'm not trying to go against DB'ing...I guess I let her get me kind of caught up in the moment while I was trying to get the last of my things and she was just being so cold and hateful...having just come from the men's conference I just had a different spirit kind of running through me...one that I felt was leading to me let her know it doesn't HAVE to be this way.

All of last week she made it very clear that she felt it was best she didn't communicate with me anyways.

I don't man...I guess she just caught me in a state of vulnerability and I took the bait. I don't know if there is a way to "rectify" what I "did" but I honestly wasn't trying to guilt her but I guess it sometimes doesnt matter what I was trying to do...it's about how she perceived my actions.

A huge part of me just wants to see if I can call to cancel the utility account I have if it won't cost anything for her to start up service in her name so I don't have to see her today.

If I do see her, I don't know how to "present" myself to "undo" any further damage I did on Saturday.