It's a pretty good day for a Monday. I spent much of the weekend at home reflecting on things and that is never fun, but it was necessary. I needed to get my thoughts in order, to readjust my attitude and to feel my hurt and anger privately and fully.

Now, I feel more ready to embrace a PMA.

I think I've made further progress in the transition from seeing my H as the man I married to seeing him for who he really has become. I don't like everything he's done, but there's still lots to like about him, and I'm choosing to focus on those things.

What makes this easier is that I no longer have any plans to DB to salvage our M. I am no longer in save-the-marriage mode. I want to move on with my life, away from the place of pain, betrayal and anger. I am ready to accept that it's better for me to be alone right now, to pursue my own self-growth and to figure out what I want out of life. I can go a step further and say that I do not trust my H to be a steady, empowering influence in my life right now - and anything less than that is unacceptable for me.

I am determined to surround myself with empowering, positive and strengthening people, activities and things.

How do you transition from spouses to friends? That is the question.

Me: 33, H: 32
M: 12 years T: 13 years
No kids
D-Day: 7/2009
Separated: 10/12/10
Future Unknown
GITS

"There's a fire starting in my heart, reaching a fever pitch and it's bringing me out the dark." - Adele