Thought it would be done by now...

[25yearsmlc]

I know this is wrong but today I do equate my happiness if H is miserable or unhappy. I don't want him enjoying himself. I like to hear he looks bad, etc. I know its is childish but right now he doesn't seem to be suffering ANY consequences of what he has done to our family and it makes me angry. I am dealing with the tears of his children and my broken heart and he is out partying and living with OW.
Venting here today!

I understand this. I do. Facing the mess HE made with the kids is UNFAIR and sad and tough to deal with. Been there, done that. Still am dealing with it in the sense that d22 has been affected by h's AWOL status while she was in high school.

But when I go too far with my "unfair to ME/HER" approach, I say "AFRICA" and shut up.

(I mean, talk about unfair...and recall some perspective)

Also, you are mind reading about his happiness and projecting a bit of unrealness to his life...as if he's "out partying" with OW all the time.

Think they ever do laundry? Vacuum? Wash dishes? Fart or burp?

Is it ALL UBER great sex w/multiple climaxes and dancing, staring into each other's eyes, repeatedly?

Think they EVER fight? Ever get angry or unreasonable?

Or do they ALWAYS know what the other one meant or said or thought? Are their memories identical? Oh, no. YOU have history with him, not her.

While I dislike the tone of the proverb, it bears repeating....

"the best revenge is a life well lived."

So go live it. Let HIM wonder and let yourself BE HAPPY...or at least happiER...

rent a scary movie (or a comedy? Or Avatar or whatever makes YOU and the kids happy) and make popcorn

and have your own party.

AND LIFE, how are those GAL things going?