Going "dark" or "dim" is not "ignoring her." It is a sound strategy, grounded in the concept that the betrayed spouse needs to do it in order to protect themselves, emotionally. As long as Denver says something to his wife like one of the suggested scripts above (such as "I'm not ignoring you, just giving you the space you said you needed"), then it's not petty or vindictive, and it's his best chance. NOTHING good ever comes out of his exchanges with his wife.
