and today I woke up to a few old wedding pictures of me and my WAW. Apparently she put them on her phone and sent them at some point during the night with messages attached saying things like I miss these days & I miss who we were back then I don't think I'm even going to bother responding to it. I mean really what does a person say to that?
Up before the sun is even out. At least it's not raining though! Going over to visit my dad today since he's out of the hospital now and from there who knows. Might see if one of my friends is available to hang out today.
Rough day. Haven't responded to any of the texts yet but have received several this morning about missing us. Wishing things had been different. How she listened to our song a lot last night. How it was a rough night. I keep fighting the urge to text her back and say yeah well you threw us away because you couldn't keep your legs closed and I give up on trying to fix us. I won't I just feel like saying something to try to hurt her the way she's hurt me.
I just find myself missing her horribly today. My mind keeps jumping back to how we used to be and how we are now. That marriage is gone though. I know that until she gets the help she needs this is a pattern that is going to keep repeating itself. I just feel so much sadness right now.
we don't really see each other anymore. She sends some texts sometimes I respond sometimes I don't.
I honestly have no idea what's up with all her texts. As tempting as it is to ask I'm not going too. No secret anniversary or anything like that that I know of anyways. Just one of those days.
It happened today. She called me and mentioned that she had been having thoughts of wanting to come back and then proceeded to say that she needed time to think. I told her I needed time as well to decide if that is something I would want as well.
It really is a tough decision. I've got a new life now. She's off doing her own thing with the other guy and thinking of wanting to come back at the same time. Which really makes no sense to me. Of course as has been mentioned bi polar what kind of sense can be made. Regardless of what kind of feelings there are right now my goal is to just keep focusing on moving forward. I can't put my life on hold while she is with someone else while trying to decide what she wants.
So after a long day of her texting me off and on she finally texts me and says I can't be with you it's not where I want to be anymore.I don't feel anything for you. Seriously? Why say anything at all then? Kind of a jacked up thing to say. Big turn around from yesterday saying been thinking of coming back. still loves me. misses me and whatnot. Does she think this is some kind of game or something? gees
something happened in her brain... and she reverted to run mode...
perhaps she's given you a clue...
"I don't feel anything for you."
Empty? Really? Or has her "feel" simply been transfered or stuffed...?
Are you still doing the things that she "misses"? If not, could / would you get back to that stuff? Back to the parts of the man she misses? 'cause there's certainly some feeling "there"...
