I meant HIS guilt. His feeling guilty is why he lashes out one minute and avoids the kids the next. Passive/Aggressive type. Normal, I think, for MLC. While I ache for you and your D's pain, I think I hurt the most for your son. He, like my D's, feel abandoned by the only person they ever considered Dad.
Regardless of what he says or does, he knows he is at fault where the kids are concerned, and the guilt is overwhelming. I once made my X a shirt that said, upside down on his chest so he could look down and read it, IT'S NOT MY FAULT. White shirt, red letters. That was 9 years ago. These days, I'd have to have the letters lower down on his overhang. LOL
