Just getting some things together here, found out that there's technically no such thing as leg sep in Canada, although it may be in my jurisdiction. I'll talk about it with my L, but this may just be a process of legal, financial dissolution as a step to filing D.
Anyhow, regardless...
Again, this is stuff I'll run past my L, but here's the premise:
I've run some rough numbers and based on assets (not taking into consideration spousal or child support), the "money offer" my W made is only about 1/3 (worst) to 1/2 of what the final numbers might show. Spousal and child support could add as much as an additional 80% to the asset numbers, as a "bulk payout" amount (as opposed to a monthly disbursement over a period of years).
Her current offer is at least better than the initial 1/4 she offered earlier.
I had NO idea where we might be at because I wasn't interested in going there at the time. Now that I've committed to moving forward, I did a "reality check" to see if taking her current offer might be worth it...
As I mentioned, I will be running this by my L as well as how to broach the subject with my W, who will be coming back from a 2 week vacay (camp) with the kids.
My knee jerk (raw and not at all refined, I'm typing and posting as I'm formulating, and would certainly refine regardless) approach I expect to do by email, to protect myself from what is most likely going to be an absolute, over the top reaction by my W:
"W,
I have met with my Lawyer and we ran some rough numbers on financial dissolution.
As you may be aware, your offer of $X is only 1/3 to 1/2 of what we believe is a fair split, in accordance with the law.
I understand you do not wish to have our situation dragged through the courts, for financial reasons. If we have to go through the courts, it will require complete transparency of all financials, likely for a period of the past two years as well as current year, perhaps even longer back.
Please advise how you came up with the amount you're offering and we can discuss a more appropriate amount.
I would like to get this completed as swiftly as possible so we can move forward in our lives.
KD"
The reasoning behind this is because my W is "threatening" me that going to court, I'll "likely be disappointed with the results" as my W states it.
And, she's holding this offer amount over my head (expecting me to be desperate and greedy for instant gratification) as an amount I MUST sign off on and waive all future pursuit for financial compensation.
I think she's also trying to use this as leverage against access to the kids, but I can't mind read... but every "money" conversation is entangled in "custody" conversation, by direction of my W. Very difficult to get my W to speak separately on the two items.
