How many dates until...?

[ClingingToHope]

The divorce rebuilding class I've been a part of added a session last year on sex and emotional intimacy.

Basically, they said there are five levels of emotional intimacy and a marriage truly won't be happy unless you reach the fifth level.

They said that emotional intimacy stops at whatever level you sleep with each other. Once you have sex, the relationship becomes about the sex.

It made sense to me. I looked at the chart and figured XW slept with each other between levels 1 and 2 and today I keep finding out things she never shared with me. I really don't know her at all.

So, in a way we were doomed from the start. Of course, basically they were saying, hey, next time around try to wait until you are married to have sex.

I do know I had a fling back in December and had sex on the first and second dates. There was no third date. I didn't want one. Maybe there was no thrill of the chase or I didn't respect her.

From a guy's perspective, three dates seems too easy. I really want to find someone that I like so much that I want to be with them even without sex.