WOW 25yrs! thank you so much for your amazing post!! You're right, at the moment I am letting my anger control things - it is hard not to, although I have been better with it the last few days and at least am managing to be civil.
you ask what kind of father he is - that's a difficult one. In some ways he is great and others really not so. He is completely over the top with discipline in that he tells our children off for every teeny tiny little thing that I and most other people would let slide - it causes a great deal of tension in the house. The rest of the time he is very loving and the kids adore him.
Your friend you speak of who is bitter and hasn't let it go is exactly what I'm afraid of. I'm very afraid that if we stay together I will be that bitter person.
As for do I really NEED the truth - I feel I do, I feel I'm owed that much and not only that I can't seem to move forward without it - how can you rebuild a M on lies?? which is what we would be doing if I don't feel I know the truth. I keep hearing the words forgiveness and I know you're all correct in saying so - I'm struggling to get there though.
