Having a 'blue funk' day today.' XH kept invading my thoughts, finally waking me up for good and all at 3:00 a.m. Haven't had one of these in some time, but tortured by the "If only's . . "
Although I've made many realizations about both myself and my XH, somewhere deep, deep inside, I keep trying to figure out the EXACT MOMENT when things went so wrong. Bizarre, I know. But hey, if they can trace back to the original carrier of the AIDS virus, why can't I trace back to that moment? Answering myself: Because it wouldn't make any difference. It's going to be a long, hot day today. Maybe I'll be so tired I'll go right to sleep and sleep through the night TONIGHT.
